Seng jor of Seng Sok jor?

These two words, are in cantonese.
LOL i can say.
Kar Soon posted it at my facebook's wall.
I once could not guess what's the meaning.
BUT, after few trials, realized that, "SENG JOR" means woke up; and "seng sok jor" means become mature.

Yea, it has been a long time, I do not want to face my past.
It was terrible, INDEED.
Some people just think that, "yes, grace tan is a friendly one."
But, I WAS not.. I use "was". (Hope it is really a past tense)

I don't dare to think about my past.
Terrible and horrible.
I... am... Urm, a bad girl.

I did many THINGS, which are hurtful, to me, and to the others, especially those who love me.
I did many crazy things, especially in my Form4 life.
I loved to think too much, and tried to achieve something with any methods I can think of.
I loved to do whatever I like.

But now, still.. I love to do my way, my own way.
One of the characteristics of Leo.
Think twice, think thrice before I want to do something, will do?
I thought I would become more GENTLE in talking, but I fail.
Diao2 (Kwei eng) asked me not to change it? As he is not used to a GENTLE grace.. (go knock, pls..)

But then, I still can stop thinking of those things of SOMEONE did to me, not even one times.
She hurts me once and once.
I have forgiven her once and once.
Too generous I will say.
My forgiveness doesn't reward me any.
It gives me only betrayals, once and once.

Yuk Chang told me, " You must experience things yourself only then you will gain something that you have never had it. Because friends you are having now, will not be there forever. You will see different people, different situation... What you are looking now is a picture on the wall which doesn't move. What you need to do is look at the 3D screen, look from all sides, or even look further."

Actually he was just copy and paste something to me. But, it calms me.
Although it has been a long time, he sent this to me.
But, what I see is, I have successfully tried his method, towards the one I really damn sien.
Somehow, a friend of mine told me that, I might be too cold-blooded if I keep using this angle to see everyone, instead of giving them a chance to entering my world.

Everyone gives me a different opinion.

However, I really do think that, I have changed.
I will never let the one who is trying to hurt me, get closer to me? Again?.. I think?
I live my own life, you please, do your great also.
Continue with your studies, your lies, your dreams, your imaginations, your men, your girls, etc.
Good luck to you?

Good luck to me. (: